This is a sweet, funny poem, typical of Toparceanu's lyrical sensibility. It's also perfectly seasonal, seeing as to how, finally, fall has come around here, after a prolonged, humid, smelly, insufferable summer. I learned this poem from my father (who loved it!) when I was very very young. I didn't understand the irony one bit (what, I was 6? 7, maybe?), so the poem might have been lost on me then. However, I never forgot it, and to this day I could still recite it at will!
I've included the raw, literal translation in the middle, then my version, which preserves, mostly, the trochaic, 8-syllable rhythm--at some linguistic expense, though, as it is patently clear.
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Toamna în parc de George Toparceanu Cad grăbite pe aleea Parcului cu flori albastre Frunze moarte, vorba ceea, Ca iluziile noastre. Prin lumina estompată De mătasa unui nor, Visătoare trece-o fată C-un plutonier-major. Rumen de timiditate El se uită-n jos posac. Ea striveşte foi uscate Sub pantofii mici de lac. Şi-ntr-o fină discordanţă Cu priveliştea sonoră, Merg aşa, cam la distanţă, El major şi ea minoră... |
Autumn in the Park (raw version) Hurriedly [they] fall on the alley Of the park with blue flowers Dead leaves, as the saying goes, Like our illusions. Through the light blurred By the silk of a cloud, A girl is walking, dreaming, With a sergeant-major. Ruddy with shyness, He looks down, sullenly. She squashes dry leaves Under her small patent shoes. And in a fine discordance With the sonorous view They walk sort of at a distance, He a major, she a minor… |
Fall in the park
by George Toparceanu Falling swiftly on the alley Of the park with flowers blue In a long autumnal rally, Dead leaves—as our dreams are, too. In the light that’s softly sifting Through the silken cloud below, Dreamily a girl is drifting, Sergeant major in her tow. Timid, flushed, and all aflutter, He looks down, very confused, She is squashing leafy clutter. Under her small patent shoes. And in a refined discordance With the view that’s ever finer, They keep walking, at a distance, He a major—she a minor. |
